By Usama Abdullahi
Lack of trust is a significant factor affecting marriages these days. I know a man who recently got engaged to his girlfriend. Everything was going fine for him and his fiancée until he caught her talking to another guy. When he saw her with the guy, he reported him to Market Management, where they both work. This may seem ridiculous, but I understand the pain of betrayal.
However, I’m unsure if the guy he caught talking to his fiancée is having an affair with her. Up to now, there’s no sufficient evidence to prove such claims. Yet, two things stand out in this story. One is that, as a prospective couple, you should never feel suspicious of each other. Suspicion always sets in when you don’t trust your partner. Before you decide to get engaged to your partner, make sure you trust them because trust significantly improves your relationship.
Trust is crucial in every relationship, and its absence destroys the foundation upon which the relationship is built. Regarding marriage decisions, things should not be carried out in haste. By rushing things, you disregard every necessary step to make the marriage work. Like patience, trust is highly required in building successful relationships. Even though some people believe that “successful relationships” do not exist. Still, mistrust or suspicion destabilises relationships.
The story of the man I told is one of the apparent reasons that cause marriage failure in our modern society. Many people can agree with me that the people who are often suspicious of their romantic partners aren’t always found innocent of the things they suspect in those partners. They could be the ones who are guilty, while their partners could be free from guilt. Other times, the partners could both be guilty, which might ruin their long-term relationship. So, to avoid destroying your decade-long relationship by a lack of trust, ensure that you marry or fall in love with someone you can trust.
If you suspect your partner is having an affair with someone other than you, confront them and talk the way out. Sometimes, your suspicions might be wrong. And it takes one to know one. Moreover, if you constantly get suspicious of your partner, you should always question yourself. Maybe you’re the one with such questionable characters. Or perhaps your instinct is misleading you into thinking otherwise. It’s also advisable not to marry the person you usually get suspicious of.
Usama Abdullahi writes from Abuja and can be reached at email@example.com.