By Uzair Adam Imam
Marriage break-up is perceived as one of the major challenges bedevilling relationships in Kano State, a development that leaves a severe psychological impact on the windows. A report by the BBC Network African Programme in collaboration with the Kano State disclosed that there were over one million divorcées in the state.
The research disclosed that 32% of marriages in Kano State survives only a period of three to six months; and that many young people between the age of 20-25 years are said to have gone through three marriages at least.
The Executive Director National Association of Divorcees/Widows and Orphans, Hajiya Altine Abdullahi, decried the rate of divorce in the state. She had once threatened to protest the menace. This menacing issue of marriage break-up has continued to witness a steep increment in Kano State more recently, making it a serious problem needing mitigation.
The Daily Reality had reported materialism as one of the contributing factors militating against marriages these days.
Divorce, how abrupt it occurs
As though a competition, many husbands partake in the race for divorce. The issue has now graduated to a national problem in dire need of mitigation.
A photographer, Aminu A. Gambo, recounted the harrowing tale of how a one-week-old marriage crashed.
He said, “I once covered a wedding. The wedding took us almost a week, as they started the events from Tuesday throughout Thursday the following week and had a break on Friday.
“The events continued on Saturday and Sunday was wedding Fatiha, which concluded with conveyance of bride late evening that day.
“In the subsequent week, on a fateful Wednesday, the groom called me as early as 6 am and told me to calculate my balance and send my account number. As I did, he then transferred the amount to my account and told me that their marriage was no more,” he stated.
Also, Abubakar Umar confided in our reporter that he was rather perplexed on hearing that the marriage he attended just a week ago had broken up.
Umar said the marriage had broken up even before some relatives who attended the wedding from far places returned to their various destinations.
He added, “it came to me as a surprise that a week-old marriage had broken up just abruptly like this despite the bond between the couple.”
Understanding the root cause
Many concerned citizens argued that there are no tangible reasons behind the increased marriage dissolution.
Hashim Ibrahim described the menacing issue as a problematic phenomenon that defies every explanation.
He said, “The problem is that what triggers Mr A to divorce his wife might not be the same reason for Mr B to end his marriage.”
Muhammad Tasi’u stated that: “There are only two things that lead to the marriage breaking up; the exaltation of men and the ignorance of women.”
Aisha Mujitaba looked at the issue from a different angle, saying guys pretend to be rich in order to woo girls.
“Nowadays, both loves and marriages are based on materialism; that is how equivocation and deception have chipped in in the process of getting married.
“Guys pretend to be wealthy in order to win girls’ hearts. Consequently, when they are joined in matrimony, the true nature of what the person is will be revealed. This leads to the breakdown of relationships,” Aisha said.
Fatima Sha’aibu also believed that lying was one of the contributing factors leading to the marriage break up.
She said, “Mostly guys lie to win affections. Then after the marriage, when the truth was revealed, the girl might feel she can’t resist living with a life-faking husband.”
Most of the marriage before getting in both the couples have to go to some agency’s like NDLEA to test their Brain and see if there’s no problem because the issue gotten worse.